Far from only being able to listen, N was the first to speak. To the astonishment of us all – and the complete disbelief of a few, she said, quite nonchalantly, “I was a seamstress and made Princess Marina’s wedding dress!” “WOW!” I exclaimed, feeling deep admiration and “How fantastic…!” and “Could you possibly tell us about it?”
Not so much a question as a suggestion. I could see and hear that she was really engaged and feeling more confident. A conversation with a person with advanced dementia can be like approaching a sensitive creature in the wild… move too fast and they might run away frightened, move too slowly and they might freeze. If we moved cautiously, might she share more?
N continued slowly, completely absorbed in her memory, “It was very simple and elegant, with a 17-foot train… quite understated really…” (see picture) she continued, with her own masterful understatement.
“Were you the only person to make it or was there a team?” I asked, working hard to keep a lid on my excitement. Long-forgotten fashion industry memories of my own popped up uninvited.
“Oh yes”, she continued, “there were five of us. There were two wedding dresses made, from specially woven white silk and real silver thread. It was fine, but very heavy.”
She went on to tell us about her job, the dress, its design by the couturier Molyneux; how an identical second dress was made in Paris by Russian refugees, “so that the unworn one could be exhibited at Buckingham Palace,” describing her team’s disappointment that in the end, it was the French dress that Princess Marina wore on the day – 29th November 1934, because of her special relationship with the people who made it.
N described in detail how the seamstresses sewed the hem in tiny sections, gesticulating the movement of the needle, thread and fabric, “we’d caste on, sew five stitches, and then caste off again,” so that if the heel of the bride’s shoe accidentally caught in it, “they were very high”, the whole hem wouldn’t unravel. N might have advanced dementia, but who would have known?